Soon enough

Soon enough


In 30 seconds

you will be underwater

In 40 seconds

you will be



In 45 seconds

the light will turn green

And in 50

you’ll nearly kill your little sister.


In 55

she’ll realized what’s happened.

And in 60

she’ll panic.



“Dude… would you be okay

if we stop at dads?”

I remember that his wife is home today.



“No I just really need a drink of water.”

No man, I just don’t feel too well.



I feel….


That kind of warm that makes you… tired.

I blink.



and then…

Something’s gone wrong.



“Abby, is the light green?”

“Abby, are my eyes open?”

Are they

even… open?



“Are you sure?”

Everything is black.

Everything is dark.



There’s no way my eyes

aren’t closed.



I have to…

I have to…

have to…

I have to pull over this car.

I have to get us off the road.

I have to get out of the way of other cars.



Why didn’t we call 911?




You have to

guide me…

drive me…

Get us out of the way.



Tell me when the light turns.

“is it green yet?”

“is it green now?”

In my mind other cars are already rushing by.



“Okay, it’s green”

Keep the car straight.

Keep us in a line.



I don’t think by now she realized what happened.



We need to…

Turn off.

Get off the road.

“Dude, tell me when to turn.”

Turn right.

Get off the road.



“Turn now.”

No not there.

“Turn now.”

No not there.



Nothing will compare

to the feeling of seeing things that aren’t really there.

but on some level

above the water you’re under

knowing these visions don’t really exist.



The feeling of driving on a life size blueprint.

On hallucinogens

A trip

that creates a new vision

for blinded wide open eyes.


Where you’re told to turn

Doesn’t match with this blueprint.

blue hue and white dotted lines ahead of you.


Surely it’s the blueprint

that needs followed instead.



Why turn there?

There’s no turn shown there.



3 seconds

too late

you’re told to turn.


3 seconds because

the blueprint has a lag

because I can’t lift my arms.

My whole body is…





There’s a scream

To “Turn!”

And calm as can be

I do.

I feel myself more so than I do

perform the action myself.



Someone grab the wheel.



I feel

my fingers



all turn right.

And the great vehicle roars in it’s






We’re turning too slow.

Too wide.

Too fast.

Too sharp.



How far into the gas pedal was my foot?



On the blueprint

We turn right.

We turn left

In real life.



Into oncoming traffic.

Into honking horns.

In the hallucination:

for going too slow.



Hearing is gone

Sight is gone

I remember a white vehicle coming at us.

At the last second.

Before I turned.



Touch on reality






Something registers




and somehow it registers in someway.



Nothing will compare

To the feeling of seeing things that aren’t there.

To the feeling that

Something that wasn’t you

stopped you.



I’m grey.

I’m sweating.

Hair clings to my face.

Things are blurry.

but the blueprint is gone.


is         returning.



“Call… Call…”

Why didn’t we call 911?


She’s closest.



I don’t know where we are.

I don’t know what I’m parked in front of.


A chain link fence.

Beside a ditch.

On the wrong side

of a two lane road.



70 seconds ago

I wish I’d known

“Don’t touch the gas pedal.”

“Don’t move this vehicle.”


3 minutes ago

I wish I’d known

“Don’t get in that truck.”



There’s a siren down the way

I hit a car.

I injured somebody.

It’s an ambulance

I’m sure.

“I’m sorry.”




She’s on the phone.



“No, no, there’s no color in her face.”

“No, she doesn’t look okay.”


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