NOT

I’m NOT

I’m not that one

I’m not the one.

 

The one that blows kisses

The one that dances out the night

I’m not the one smiling bright.

 

I’m not the one in pink,

I’m not the one in heels and dresses

with love finding many ways of expressions.

 

I’m not the girl you ordered,

I’m not the girlfriend of your dreams.

I’m not here to please you by all means.

 

I’m not the one that says all the right things,

I’m not the one that does all the right things.

And it’s a fear upon me that constantly springs.

 

I’m not the girlfriend you ordered.

I’m not the girlfriend you dreamt of.

 

I’m the one of real life,

The one that’ll wake you from that damned sleep

Because I’m so much fucking upkeep.

 

I’m the one from whom you’d better get the hint.

I’m the one that’ll make you work

With the texts and calls each day,

“The desire to see you isn’t too much to ask” I say.

 

When it is I’m the one that throws a cow

Because I’m the one with more than one emotion

And sometimes I’m the one that becomes a mess

When I’m the one looking over the edge.

 

I’m the one that wants space and quiet,

I’m the one that’s moody

All of the time.

I’m the one that’s high maintenance with double standards set in a line.

 

So when you get scared –

And I know you will –

You’ll back off and it won’t be a big deal.

Just like everyone else who couldn’t handle me for anything more than sex appeal.

 

Because I’m not like the girl you saw in the mall.

Shopping bags full of dresses, her never-ending smile topping painted nails and heels.

 

I’m not.

And I’m not.

I’m just not.

 

So here’s my fine print,

My warning if you will.

 

I’m not the stereotype you perceived me to be.

And I’m the one you won’t can’t foresee to keep.

Advertisements